What’s up cool dudes? As those of you in the know are already aware of, the world is about to boil over with crazy but for time’s sake here’s just a few of the stories that mattered to me. WARNING: This post contains kind of a lot of profanity.
1. U.S. Charity Warns North Korea’s Food Will Run Out in June. And whose fault is that? Surely not the immaculate, handsome, almighty, brilliant and sexy supreme leader? It must be those dastardly southern traitors and the imperialist American Empire! -_- I have zero sympathy for a starving country that doesn’t have money for food but apparently it can have a nuclear weapons program and the fourth largest army in the world. All of North Korea’s problems are the product of shitty decision-making, a shitty form of government, shitty leaders and shitty friends. The whole country is just covered in shit. They keep trying to bribe NK with food or financial aid to get them to chill out and come back to the negotiating table to drop it’s nuke program and maybe consider reuniting with the south. But seriously. The south probably doesn’t even want to reunite. Do you have any idea what a pain that would be? All the brainwashed zombies that would have to be reeducated, all the work it would take to build and update infrastructure and the inevitable battle with loyalist insurgents. It’s just not worth the trouble. Let them starve to death. Good riddance.
2. Barrack Obama. I actually don’t have a huge problem with Obama. The GOP likes to try to blame all our problems on him but our issues started years ago. The debt was trouble when Bush went on his rampage across the world. I was cool with Afghanistan but Iraq was our bad. Sorry about that. The financial crisis was the result of people making too many tweaks to a system that worked great and over several decades the constant little "fixes" broke the system. I agree with most of Obama’s policies and the only gripes I have with him are that he’s too cautious in his foreign policy and too laid back. It’s one or the other. When countries start getting out of line he needs to step up and slap them down. China has gotten brave in the last 2 years and when they are going to do something bad they send out a preemptive “mind your own business America” announcement. Obama needs to make it his business in a clear and confrontational message. The world needs to see that the US can’t be pushed aside so easily. And when the North Koreans sank that South Korean ship last year he should have gone on national television and said, verbatim, “North Korea, if I find out that you were responsible for this, we WILL fuck you up.” But he didn’t. He was pretty quiet about it. That was also the time when the US government was waiting to see if China would take responsibility of mediating the crisis as a rising superpower. It didn’t. Obama should have flipped his shit.
3. Chinese Economy to Surpass US in 5 Years. Duuuuuuuh. It was only a matter of time. And if you’re going to blame anyone, blame the US government. They’ve foreseen this since the 1960’s and done nothing. America's dominance is a direct result of the policies implemented by politicians who actually knew what they were doing back in the late 40's and 50's. China’s population is 5 times greater than that of the US. More workers=more production=greater exports=big bucks. That combined with profiteering of Western companies who want to make stuff for cheap over there and sell here for a 10,000% profit. There’s a name for that. Robber Baron or something. I’m not surprised about China’s economy surpassing the US’s and neither should you be. Nothing wrong with second best. But it’ll be interesting to see how China’s economy is affected by the impending shitstorm of social issues that are taking shape right now. For now we need to adapt just like they did.
4. Iran is Making Its Own Internet. Textbook insanity. The Iranians don’t want their people to be corrupted by the Western dominated regular internet so they’re going to make a “Halal” internet just for Farsi speaking Persians so they can “create an internet that conforms to Islamic principles, to improve its communication and trade links with the world.” And to “increase Iran and the Farsi language’s presence in what has become the most important source of international communication.” That’s pretty deep. Too bad only 70 million people in the world speak it and of those only around 80% can read it. So what’s the point? Many governments and organizations say it’s aimed at further restricting freedom of information. I’m inclined to agree.
5. Man Opens Fire on Americans in Afghanistan. That’s normally not such a crazy occurrence in Afghanistan but check this out. The guy was actually a 20 year veteran of the Afghan Army and an officer! He got into an argument with some American soldiers and then shot and killed 8 of them and a civilian contractor. Because y’know, that’s what you do when you get in an argument with somebody. Of course he was gunned down immediately. And then when the police interviewed the guy’s brother he said that the murderer was mentally sick. Yep. That’s right. The ANA allows insane people to serve as officers. This guy wasn’t just a little weird from the heavy action he saw in the 80’s, he was totally batshit insane. This is the 16th time an Afghan soldier has turned on NATO personnel. What. The. Fuck. Why are their dudes allowed to be around our guys? They should be segregated. End of story. Don’t trust any of them with a gun and for God's sake don't turn your back on them.
That’s it for today. I’m sorry it ended on such a bum story but I think it needs to be known what kind of people our boys have watching their backs. Here’s a kitten to lighten things up.